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FOR SCHOOLS
teasing
The following
is excerpted
from Mom They're Teasing Me by Michael Thompson,
Lawrence Cohen, and Catherine Grace.
Click here
to learn more or to purchase this book.
Mom They're
Teasing Me: Children at
Risk
Popular children: In the younger grades, being popular is the same as being well-liked
and having many friends. As children get older they can be
popular, but also be disliked or even feared, because of their
social power. These “queen bees” and “alpha males” may
eventually be dethroned and become rejected, or they might not
be able to trust that their friendships are genuine.
Accepted children: These children are well-liked, but are not at the very top of the
social scene. Most importantly, they have friends and they feel
a part of the group. They do experience social suffering--they
may have a fight with a friend, get teased, have a secret
betrayed, or wish to be higher status than they are. But they
are not at serious risk.
Rejected children: Rejected children are actively disliked by the majority of their
peers, or sometimes by everyone in their class or grade. Some
of them, rejected-aggressive children, respond to this
rejection by being aggressive and obnoxious. Or they were
overly aggressive first, which may have contributed to their
rejection. They run the risk of criminal or antisocial
behavior, dropping out of school, and substance abuse problems.
Other rejected children are rejected-submissive. They
are the ones who are the victims of bullies, who don’t fight
back or speak up. The risk they run is of depression and severe
loneliness, but on the positive side, rejected-submissive
children usually find a friend or a supportive peer group by the
time they reach high school or shortly thereafter.
Neglected children: Some children are neither liked nor disliked by peers. They are
almost invisible, even to their teachers, because they tend to
do their work and keep quiet and don’t misbehave. They run the
risk of depression or even suicide.
Controversial children: Class clowns, bullies, clique leaders, and kids with
ADHD often have one thing in common -- they are strongly liked
by some people (at least some of the time) and strongly disliked
by others. This makes them controversial, and they have a risk
of not fitting in when they grow up.
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